Joke

[elpopo]

Well, let s try to translate a french joke in english...


A French man, an English man and a georgous norway girl are together in the same part of a train.
Suddenly, they go throught a tunnel and everything fall into obscurity..
Then, a smack sound followed by a slap sound...
After the tunnel, the english is holding his head and seems to be a little knock out..
The english thought that the french guy tried to kiss the girl, she believed it was me and slap me..
The norway girl thought the english one tried to kiss her, but in the dark he missed and kiss the french which slapped him.
The French guy thought " At the next tunnel, i ll do again a smack sound in order to hit again this english [f*cker]!"

hard to translate a joke xD sorry




Un jour dans un train, en Provence, un Anglais un Français et une jolie Norvégienne sont dans le même compartiment d'un train.
Ils roulent comme ça, sans se parler, depuis des heures quand un tunnel vient plonger le train dans l'obscurité la plus totale.
On entend alors un bruit de bisou immédiatement suivi d'un bruit de baffe dans la face.
Quand le tunnel se termine, que la lumière revient, le Français et la Norvégienne sont assis comme si de rien n'était et l'Anglais se tient la tête à deux mains, tête visiblement très amochée.

L'Anglais se dit "Le Français a du embrasser la Norvégienne, elle a cru que c'était moi et elle m'a colle un pain."
La Norvégienne pense "L'Anglais a du vouloir m'embrasser mais il a loupé son coup et embrassé le Français qui n'a pas apprécié."
Le Français se dit "Au prochain tunnel, je refais le bruit du bisou pour coller une autre mandale a cet enculé d'Anglais."

[yahoo_bot]

A French and British general were surveying a battlefield. A bullet strikes the British general, grazing his arm. He shouts "Aide! Bring me my red jacket!"
The French general asks "Why did you do that?"
The British general responds "So my men don't see that I'm bleeding, and lose hope."
A second bullet narrowly misses the French general's ear, and he shouts: "Aide! Bring me my brown trousers!"


touché

[elpopo]

i hate that but it s funny...

go on http://www.google.co.uk

type : french military victories

then click on " i m feeling lucky"
...

[D!eHard]

Pmsl.....

Ya beat us in 1066...

http://www.eyewitnesstohistory.com/bayeux.htm

[elpopo]

yeah and for the 1000th anniversary, we plan to invade u again

[D!eHard]

Yeah...But you nearly became part of Britain in 1956...

The following is an extract from a British government cabinet paper of the day. It reads:
"When the French Prime Minister, Monsieur Mollet was recently in London he raised with the prime minister the possibility of a union between the United Kingdom and France." Mollet was desperate to hit back at Nasser. He was also an Anglophile who admired Britain both for its help in two world wars and its blossoming welfare state.
There was another reason, too, that the French prime minister proposed this radical plan.
Tension was growing at this time along the border between Israel and Jordan. France was an ally of Israel and Britain of Jordan. If events got out of control there, French and British soldiers could soon be fighting each other.
With the Suez issue on the boil Mollet could not let such a disaster happen.
Secret document
So, when Eden turned down his request for a union between France and Britain the French prime minister came up with another proposal.
This time, while Eden was on a visit to Paris, he requested that France be allowed to join the British Commonwealth. This, if accepted, would make the Queen France's head of state.
A secret document from 28 September 1956 records the surprisingly enthusiastic way the British premier responded to the proposal when he discussed it with his Cabinet Secretary, Sir Norman Brook.
It says: "Sir Norman Brook asked to see me this morning and told me he had come up from the country consequent on a telephone conversation from the prime minister who is in Wiltshire.
"The PM told him on the telephone that he thought in the light of his talks with the French:

[elpopo]

first time of my life i hear about this story..

LIES !!!

[umbongo(uk)]

look you wankers this is joke not bloody history 1 on 1,,


3 Irish men walk into a cafe and start wanking, waitress shouts , "oy, what the [f*ck] do you think your doing , ?" paddy points to the sign , 1st come , 1st served.....

3 men watching a lap dancer, cockney , brummie and a scouser , cockney pulls a £20 note and sticks it on her left buttock, brummie pulls a tenner and sticks it on her right buttock , scouser pulls out his stolen visa and swipes it beteen her arse cheeks and takes £40 cashback

Why do scotsmen have blue willies?
Because they are tight fisted wankers.

[sw337]

ownt. ><